Regret Can Be All-Consuming: How You Can Overcome It
Regret, a powerful emotion, can often consume us, leaving us stuck in the past. But, it's possible to overcome it. Let's delve into understanding its nature and explore strategies to navigate through its overwhelming waves, fostering personal growth and resilience.
Neuroscientists explore the neurobiology of regret and provide tips to overcome feelings of regret
Feelings of regret are linked to negative emotions such as sorrow, remorse, and helplessness
- Dealing with regret is even more difficult because of the other negative emotions connected to it
- Regret can increase our stress, negatively affect physical health and throw off the balance of hormone and immune systems
- It can be overcome through interventions like therapy and evidence-based strategies
More knowledge = less regret
At first, Jay pushed away his feelings of regret.
- Eventually, he accepted the pain of not knowing what might have happened, but also reminded himself of his rationale at the time, which was actually quite reasonable
- Practicing self-compassion allowed him to build resilience, move on from the negative emotions and ultimately forgive himself
- On making future decisions, Jay recognized the importance of obtaining as much information about opportunities as possible
A’sense of stuckness’
There are basically two ways to experience regret: One is what researchers refer to as the action path and the other is the inaction path
- Research suggests that action-related regrets, although painful, spur people to learn from their mistakes and move on.
- Inaction path: The things undone, the opportunities lost, is harder to fix. This kind of regret is more likely to lead to depression, anxiety, and a sense of “stuckness”
Accept, acknowledge and forgive yourself
Forgiving yourself for actions taken or not taken is a powerful step toward overcoming regret.
- A commonly used cognitive psychological model called REACH, which asks people to recall the hurt (face it), empathize, offer forgiveness, and commit publicly (share it), can help with this.