Why perfectionism stops us from creating new habits

Why perfectionism stops us from creating new habits
Why perfectionism stops us from creating new habits

Parent Post

When we decide to

When we decide to create a new habit — exercise, healthy eating, meditation, writing — we can get excited and optimistic, and have an idea of how it will go perfectly.

We might do really well for a few days or even a couple of weeks, but inevitably we’ll miss a day or two because of some reason

And then things get derailed, because of our perfect idea of how we hoped the habit would go.

Reality-based habit changeWhat if

Reality-based habit change

What if we simply said, “Let me try to bring a daily ritual of doing X into my life, and be curious about what it will be like”?

So there doesn’t have to be a fantasy that it will go perfectly or brilliantly. We can bring an intention to do it, and a curiosity about what that will be like.

It’s a cause for curiosity — what got in the way? What would it be like to start again today?

Each day becomes a lovely place of learning.

The idea that we

The idea that we should be super consistent and perfect in our habit attempts … derails us.

Here’s what typically happens:

  • We think, “I’m going to start doing X every day!” Then our minds get excited and we daydream.
  • We start trying to do X every day.
  • Reality doesn’t match the imagination in some way.
  • We get frustrated by the way things are going. We are disappointed in ourselves. We’re discouraged. We eventually quit and our self-image gets hurt.

The problem isn’t the

The problem isn’t the reality, it’s the expectation that things will go a certain way.

How could we find a different way?

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